Blitzo VS King Knight (2024)

Description[]

Helluva Boss VS Shovel Knight! These two are selfish, arrogant, and egotistical, and they've hurt the ones that they've cared about, much to their guilt, but who would win? The Boss of the I.M.P.? Or the Greedy King of the Valley?

Interlude[]

Wiz: Some people make a name for themselves by working hard and going to the top, but they're so egotistical that they hurt everyone around them.

Boomstick: Like Blitz, the founder of I.M.P.! Also, the O is silent.

Wiz: And King Knight, the selfish, prideful king of the Valley.

Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick!

Wiz: And it's out job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find out who would win... a Death Battle!

Blitzo Clowns Around In DEATH BATTLE![]

Boomstick: Do you want revenge on a certain someone but you're already dead and in Hell? Well don't worry! Cause the Immediate Murder Professionals are on the case! You'll be hiring the services of the wimpy, weapons expert, Moxxie, the kick-ass girl from Wrath, Millie, the teenage, emo hellhound, Loona, and last but not least, the founder of this humble business, Blitz! The O is silent.

Background[]

• Name: Blitzo Buckzo (the O is silent)
• Age: Unknown
• Weight: 164.24 lbs
• Height: Probably 5 ft?
• Gender: Male
• Species: Imp Demon
• Founder of I.M.P.
• Ex of Verosika Mayday

Wiz: As a young clown, Blitz wanted fame and laughter, however in trying to do so had made him unlikable, and was constantly overshadowed by his best friend Fizzarolli- in fact! His dad favored him more than he did his own son.

Boomstick: And in one fateful day, everything somehow got worse! He accidently burned down the carnival he worked at, gaining a nasty scar, causing the loss of his BFF's limbs, getting his twin sister to hate his guts, and having a nasty case of self-loathing and PTSD.

Wiz: He then decided to make a name for himself by doing the one thing in his eyes, he was only good for: killing.

Boomstick: It's not like he was wrong, he is incredibly good at doing it! Eventually forming I.M.P. as we all know it today, and you don't do that without a bunch of weapons and skills, which he has.

Arsenal[]

• Flintlock Pistols
• Knife
• Revolvers
• Shotgun
• Uzis
• Bats
• Axe
• Grenades
• Automatic Sniper Rifle
• "My Dick" Rocket Launcher
• Asmodean Crystal

Boomstick: He's got flintlock pistols, knifes, revolvers, shotguns, an axe, uzis, bats, grenades, and automatic sniper rifle! Man, seems like my kind of guy, but it all pales to his greatest weapon... the "My Dick" Rocket Launcher! And it's so f*cking huge and can fire a "puss* Destroyer" rocket, talk about over-compensating!

Wiz: However, his most unique weapon at his disposal isn't actually a weapon, it's a crystal.

(Cut to Wiz with the Asmodean Crystal and Boomstick)

Wiz: The Asmodean Crystal was given to him by Stolas as a means to travel to the living, (opens a portal to a random place) with it, he could also potentially use it as a means for combat, teleporting everywhere and giving his opponent not that much time to think.

Boomstick: And he's incredibly skilled with all of his weapons, the only exception being the Asmodean Crystal, he's also skilled in fighting, and being a demon he has superhuman abilities and is immune to our worldly fire, but not hellfire.

(Dummi wanders in)

Dummi: My scanners indicate that the Asmodean Crystal allows Blitz to travel anywhere he wants, I wish it would teleport me away from these stupid MEATBAGS.

Wiz: Well, there's a possibility that he could also use the crystal to travel through other dimensions, such as-

(Suddenly, tentacles ensnared Dummi, dragging him into the still open portal and it immediately closed when he fully entered it, causing Wiz and Boomstick to step back in fear)

Boomstick: Um... that wasn't Hell right?

(Cut back to analysis)

Boomstick: Anyways, moving back to Blitz, he is an incredible ass-kicker, able to dodge bullets, and can keep up with Millie, who was able to kill an entire mob and a gigantic anglerfish, she even pried it's jaws open and chuck a molotov at the fish.

Wiz: A two and a half pound fish was recorded to have a bite force of 320 Newtons, meaning Blitzo could possibly lift over 5292.8 kg, enough to lift an adult elephant.

Boomstick: And he's got the feats that back up this as well.

Feats[]

• Fell from the top floor of a hospital without any injuries
• Despite being shot on the arm, he tolerated the pain with enough time to run and hide from Martha
• Fought evenly with Robo Fizz and Striker
• Survived the detonation of Loo Loo Land while he was in it
• Got tons of clients to line up for his business through just one flyer
• Beat Verosika in their little bet by default
• Easily found out about Striker's plan to assassinate Stolas during the Harvest Moon Festival.
• Him and his team killed an army of D.H.O.R.K.S. agents
• Saved Fizzarolli from Loan Sharks and murder crazed fan

Boomstick: He's constantly survived long falls, tolerate a gunshot in his arm long enough to hide, kill many trained D.H.O.R.K.S. -heh-, got a ton of clients by posting a flyer, beat Verosika in a bet by default, and defeat Striker in a fist fight, and the guy can rip out stone.

Wiz: Considering the height of the characters compared to the stone, the force to fragment something like that would take over 1156 tons! That's like pulling 13 protector-class coastal patrol boats!

Boomstick: That's impressive! He can also keep up with Robo-Fizz, who can dodge bullets while moving 26.7 times faster than sound! And survived Loo Loo Land exploding, by using the tents as a means to measure the height of the explosion it must be equal to nearly 3 tons. But just like everyone in Hell, he hasn't gotten over the guilt from the massive fire that he caused, he is also a narcissist which makes him act immature and disrespectful to his employees.

Wiz: He also doesn't know how to spell, despite having the average intelligence of a human being, despite these flaws there are few more deadly than the imp assassin, so pray to God because chances are that Judgement Day has arrived early.

Blitzo: Now who want's to play with daddy~?

King Knight Royally Enters DEATH BATTLE![]

Wiz: Enter the Valley, a place filled to the brim with colorful characters and anthropomorphic animals, like another certain city that we know, but the Valley is also home to many knights with unique weapons.

Boomstick: But unfortunately there's an Enchantress looking to rule it, and has gotten the best of the best to serve her, and one of these knights was a self-proclaimed king known as... King Knight.

Background[]

• Name: King Knight
• Height: 5'7
• Weight: Unknown
• Gender: Male
• Species: Human
• Affiliation: Order of No Quarter
• The King of Cards

Boomstick: Growing up in his mother's home, he would think that he would be the ruler of the Valley, and his mom was actually supportive of him! Good for you mom, who cares if you're supporting narcissistic douchebag who wants to overthrow the monarchy?

Wiz: But to be king he needed a starting point, that's when he found the perfect opportunity, being titled the King of Cards, one can earn this title by becoming the champion of the card game Joustus, a game where you push, pull, and sometimes cheat your way to victory, sounds perfect for someone like him.

Boomstick: And if he ever got into a fight, which happens a lot in the King of Cards story, he charges in with his Shoulder Bash! Because why would you need a weapon when you have brute strength with you?!

Abilities & Armors[]

• Shoulder Bash
  • Propels him into a deadly pirouette if crashing into objects and enemies
  • Can be use to gain height or to attack, which lets him dash afterwards
  • Wealth Whirl allows him to become a treasure magnet
  • Impact Sparks allows him to land with a small shockwave
  • Can turn it into a roll
  • Blast Roll increases the strength and energy

• Healing Tears
  • Can cry to heal himself

• Lightweight Plate
• Vestments of Vigor
• Battery Brigandine
• Rodent Regalia
• Resplendent Cape

Wiz: If his Shoulder Bash connect with an object or a foe, he can transform this into a pirouette, which can be used to gain extra height or attack, like a deadly pogo stick, and with the Wealth Whirl he literally becomes a treasure magnet while spinning. He can also turn this bash into a roll and the Blast Roll increases it's strength and energy, and the Impact Sparks allow him to land with a small shockwave.

Boomstick: And if he ever gets into a bind, he can cry like a little baby!

Wiz: That's not just any cry Boomstick, they are Healing Tears, and they allow King Knight to heal from devastating attacks.

Boomstick: Awesome! His armors are just as impressive to match, the Lightweight Plate allows him to move faster, Battery Brigandine allows him to charge up a stronger Shoulder Bash and can even direct it up or down.

Wiz: And the Resplendent Cape is a perfect resemblance of him.

Boomstick: Yeah, it's flashy, and shiny, and it's a total showoff!

Wiz: And he has many Heirlooms at his disposal.

Heirlooms[]

• Healing Hammer
• Bubble Frog
• Dueling Glove
• Scorching Saber
• Scepter of Swiftness
• Horns of Heralding
• Turn Coat
• Gyro Boots
• Propeller Blitzseed
• Decree of Destruction
• Decree of Rejuvenation
• Decree of Soaring

Wiz: His Healing Hammer allows him to heal whenever someone's hit by it, the Bubble Frog surrounds him in a bubble he can use to cross gaps, the Dueling Glove can be used to slap his opponents, the Propeller Blitzseed allows him to summons a robotic horse with a lance, and the Scepter of Swiftness allows him to strike forward while dashing so fast that he can glide over water and even strike the ground hard enough to shake the earth beneath him.

Boomstick: But my favorite is the Scorching Saber, leaping in the air and spinning the flaming sword then stabs it into the ground! Just imagine getting cut by that! He also has the Horns of Heralding which summons a bunch of horns out of nowhere and sprays damaging confetti.

Wiz: And he wouldn't be anywhere without his original servants, the rats, they can have bombs strapped to them and propellers as well and can even carry him and an entire shop with ease, but his most unique is the Turn Coat.

(Cut to Wiz with the Turn Coat and Boomstick throwing random stuff at him)

Wiz: The Turn Coat is King Knight's most useful Heirloom as it protects him from all manner of damage, and it stores the energy from enemies and projectiles. The more energy it stores the more powerful the counter-attack is. Kind of like this.

Boomstick: Wait, what?

(Wiz releases the energy from the Turn Coat causing the area around them to explode! And displayed "Technical Difficulties, Please Stand By")

Boomstick: Oh Jesus!

Wiz: Woops.

(Cut back to analysis)

Wiz: He also has Decrees which allows him to summon a Griffin that shoots out explosive spikey balls, a Troupple that heals him by... kissing him... and a Birder that can fly diagonally and can sit on... seems lazy don't you think? And unfortunately his relics use a lot of Vigor which fuels his magic, luckily his Vestments of Vigor negotiate this weakness.

Boomstick: With all these gear and more he's proven that he's a force to be reckoned with.

Feats[]

• Able to shake entire castles
• Carried an entire shop with ease
• Dodged lasers
• Shrugs off cannonball fire
• Shrug off missile hits
• Dodge natural lighting
• Survived the collapse of the Tower of Fate
• Survived the Mirror of Fate's destruction along with the recreated Valley
• Became the Joustus Champion
• Defeated Specter Knight, Plague Knight & Percy, Treasure Knight, Propeller Knight, Mole Knight, Tinker Knight, Polar Knight, Baz, King Pridemoor, Troupple King, King Birder, Mr. Hat, Phantom Striker, Enchantress and Giga Cardia

Boomstick: He can shake entire castles with his Shoulder Bash, carried an entire shop with ease, dodge lasers and natural lightning that moves over 388.3 times faster than sound!

Wiz: He's just as durable as he is strong and fast, he's shrugged off cannonball fire and missiles, strike with enough force to shift his throne room and force his foe to kneel, and even survive the Mirror of Fate's destruction! The Mirror of Fate created an exact replica of the Valley in a pocket dimension, based on the Valley's width, mountains, and biomes that are shown, an explosion like that would take over 24 gigatons of TNT! Potentially far more!

Boomstick: He even defeated an inter-dimensional goddess known as Giga Cardia, and even defeated the Enchantress herself!

Wiz: That is until she gave him an offer he couldn't deny, to be part of her Order of No Quarter and become a true king but he must abandon all of his followers that joined him... and he did it. Only he was able to bask in his glory, and had lost the respect from his mother, the one person he valued the most. Now he sits on his throne, waiting for anyone bold enough to challenge him.

King Knight: I'm King Knight! After I've won the Joustus Crown, you'll be visiting my castle instead.

Intermission[]

Wiz: Alright the combatants are set, we've run the data through all possibilities.

Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTLE!!!!!

Fight[]

Pridemoor Keep: 7:06 A.M.

(We see King Knight, on his throne, rotating his wine as he relaxes on it but a portal opens in front of the false king, standing up, alarmed and coming out of the portal was Blitz and had a backpack on him)

Blitz: So this is the place where that unlucky bastard's in huh? Wouldn't mind living here to be honest.

King Knight: Halt! Who are you? Why are you here? This is no place for some clown!

Blitz: Clown?! Listen dipsh*t, I gave up on the clown business a long time ago! ...Hey... wait a minute, are you King Knight?

King Knight: Why yes!

Blitz: Oh, perfect! I can make this quick then!

(The Imp pulls out a flintlock revolver, quickly reacting to this, King Knight swiftly Shoulder Bashed him! Sending him flying back, and King Knight landing graciously but Blitz landed on his face and quickly stood up, rubbing his head from the attack)

Blitz: OW, what the f*ck!?

King Knight: Having your face in the dirt is suitable for a foolish peasant like you!

Blitz: Foolish!? Oh who are you calling foolish you golden-colored piece of sh*t!?

(Blitz aimed his flintlock at him while King Knight readied a battle stance)

FIGHT!

(Blitz shot at him several times, but King Knight quickly avoided all the shots and quickly charged to and hit him with his shoulder again, sending him flying through the throne room's walls, landing outside on top of one of the walls of the castle. The assassin stood up and saw King Knight dashing towards him, he then shot at him again, but most of his shots missed, once the king gotten close enough, the demon used his tail to ensnare him and slam him into the ground several times and tossed him away. Blitz quickly added more gunpowder to his flintlock and saw King Knight... with his Healing Hammer)

Blitz: What the f*ck-

(He couldn't react as the self-proclaimed ruler hit him down with his hammer! Causing him to be imbedded to the ground, and allowing King Knight to hit him with a Shoulder Bash, sending him flying again! But Blitz landed on his feet and ran in circles around the king, shooting at him while King Knight was evading each shot, eventually Blitz ran out of powder and King Knight taunted him)

King Knight: Hah! Someone has ran out of gunpowder- OW!

Blitz: Woopsie Doodles!

(Blitz threw his flintlock at King Knight's face, stunning him, and brought out two Uzis to gun him down, but was hit by the face two times by King Knight's Dueling Glove and was about to be hit by it again until he caught his fist and punched him in the gut! The imp struck him with several more blows and King Knight countered with the Gyro Boots hitting him many times! Blitz was sent back by this and was forced to his knees as King Knight struck the ground! He then transformed his Shoulder Bash into a roll and sent Blitz soaring away! Like a bowling pin, Blitz, having enough of this pulled out a bat and grenade and removed the pin, and hit the grenade with his bat sending it to the king!)

Blitz: FORE!!

(But King Knight summoned his rat that had a bomb strapped to it and it quickly charged to counter the grenade, the two eventually collided making a massive explosion that destroyed the ground and caused them to fall! Blitz landed on a platform that was falling while King Knight used his rats to fly in the air)

King Knight: You DARE break MY castle?!

Blitz: Oh shut the f*ck up!

(Blitz armed his sniper rifle and began shooting at him and King Knight dodged every bullet that was coming his way and let go of the rat and used the Gyro Boots to bounce off several rubble and strike Blitz, like a Beyblade. Then King Knight leaped upwards and preformed a downwards Shoulder Bash! Slamming Blitz through the rubble and through the ground, entering a large cave, Blitz eventually kicked him off and both fell to the ground, castle ruins crashing around them, King Knight rose and was enraged by the imp that had caused all this and looked around for him)

King Knight: You can destroy my castle walls! You can use your flintlocks! But you are just another peasant destined to beg at the knees of a true KING!

(Blitz hid behind a piece of rubble and had enough of King Knight's rant, so he rolled out of his hiding spot and was shown wielding "My Dick" and shot a "puss* Destroyer" at him!)

Blitz: f*ck you! You think you can look down on me?! You think I'm smaller and not as IMPORTANT!?

(King Knight saw the missile in shock, but snapped out of it, as he used the Turn Coat to absorb the explosion, and SEND A GIGANTIC BLAST OF ENERGY BACK TO SENDER!! Blitz let go of his rocket launcher in shock)

King Knight: Yes. I. DO.

(And he was hit by the large energy blast! Causing a massive explosion! Blitz came out of the explosion, and had scars on his body, and his suit didn't look too good as well, King Knight quickly rushed to him and tackled him with his shoulder! Slamming him through dozens of stone pillars and Blitz used a grenade to get him off, damaging the king and himself in the process, but the king was undeterred, and Blitz was heavily damaged and he hit a pillar of stone that was behind him, he then pulled out a pistol but he couldn't use it as King Knight spun his Scorching Saber four times before PINNING Blitz to the pillar, setting fire to the caves! Blitz dropped his pistol and tried to remove the saber that was in him, and while trying to do so, he saw King Knight! Using his Scepter of Swiftness to dash to him and to cut him in half. Blitz desperately tried to pull it out, but was imbedded in his stomach, he then pulled out a pistol, hoping to shoot him, and King Knight went past him and did a vertical slash with the Scepter! A few moments pass... and Blitz and the stone pillar was CUT IN HALF!! The top half of Blitz's bloody, lifeless corpse fell and so did the giant stone pillar, and King Knight twirled his scepter a few times, used his left-hand to hold his scepter, and bowing if it were after a play as the Horns of Heralding came out of nowhere and sprayed confetti everywhere)

King Knight: Hmph! You were right! You were small and insignificant! Haha!

K.O.!

Results[]

Boomstick: Holy sh*t! Do you think there's a double Hell for him?

Wiz: Blitz might've been a skilled assassin but King Knight had everything he needed to make the Imp kneel.

Boomstick: Yeah, King Knight had a much more unique arsenal at the ready, and sh*t like the Healing Tears and the Decree of Rejuvenation allowed him to undo any progress Blitz made to kill him, and King Knight is shown to be better at close-ranged combat than Blitz has shown.

Wiz: But Blitz had several advantages in his own right, his guns gave him an edge in range while King Knight didn't really have any ranged weapons... but the Turn Coat is a reliable counter to every weapon in Biltz's arsenal and unlike Blitz who's shown to run out of ammo, King Knight's Vestments of Vigor Armor allowed him to gain more Vigor, which he uses for his Heirlooms, not only that, he was absurdly faster, while Blitz could keep up with speed at Mach 26, King Knight could react to speeds equal to Mach 388!

Boomstick: And to put salt on the wound, King Knight was just too tough and strong, remember Striker fragmenting that large stone which we equaled to 1156 tons AND the Loo Loo Land explosion that's equal to 3 tons? Yeah the Mirror of Fate collapsing was about 24 BILLION times stronger than that! Also I'm pretty sure an inter-dimensional goddess beats a bunch of baby-sized angels any day of the week. King Knight was just to much for Blitzo to handle.

(Cut to Wiz and Boomstick)

Wiz: Blitz might've been a skilled assassin but King Knight's strength, speed, durability, and Heirlooms turned the tides against Blitz...o.

Boomstick: You could say that Blitzo losing was "sinful" but King Knight had the "cards" to take home a W.

Wiz: The winner is King Knight.

Advantages & Disadvantages[]

• Blitzo (Loser)
  • + More Ranged Arsenal
  • + Can use the Asmodean Crystal to gain a home field advantage
  • = Both are Egotistical
  • = Both are Arrogant
  • = Both are co*cky
  • - Far Weaker
  • - Far Slower
  • - Far Less Durable
  • - Ammunition was Limited
  • - Less Versatile Arsenal
  • - Not as skilled in Close-Ranged Combat
  • - Healing Tears & Decree of Rejuvenation undid any damage

• King Knight (Winner)
  • + Insanely Stronger
  • + Insanely Faster
  • + Insanely Tougher
  • + More Versatile Arsenal
  • + Vestments of Vigor negotiated limited Vigor
  • + Healing Tears & Decree of Rejuvenation undid any damage
  • + better in Close-Ranged Combat
  • = Both are Egotistical
  • = Both are Arrogant
  • = Both are co*cky
  • - Less Ranged Arsenal
  • - Asmodean Crystal can give Blitz a home field advantage

Next Time[]

Hint for the Next Time: Never-Dying Mercenaries

Connections[]

• Two selfish, arrogant, and egotistical bigshots that have made a name for themselves and have hurt the ones they love most, but can't bring themselves to apologize because of their guilt and ego
• Both serve royalty with immense power (Stolas & The Enchantress)
• Both work together with a yay-high, expert in certain types of weaponry (Moxxie & Plague Knight), and a badass with a gigantic weapon (Millie & Specter Knight)
• Both have lost their mothers and it's also their fault for doing so
• Both have an enemy who's just as skilled as they are (Striker & Specter Knight)
• Both have taken on a being unlike anything they've dealt with (The C.H.E.R.U.B.s & Giga Cardia)
• Both have a large arsenal filled with weapons
• Both are experts in combat

• OST: Royal Assassinations
  • The name references King Knight's royalty and Blitz's occupation, it would show the I.M.P. logo and would have King Knight's crown, scepter, and cape on it. Confetti and bullets would also be falling around it. The song would be made by Therewolf Media and it would be a rock version of King Knight's theme